Common autistic traits in women and girls…

Could you be autistic? Are you searching for answers to problems in your life that just don’t seem to make sense? You are not alone! The following are autistic traits common to many, but not all, autistic women and girls. This list is not inclusive of all autistic traits, rather, a compilation from my own lived experience, from reading hundreds of journal articles and listening to other autistic women’s stories…

1. Communication difficulties - trouble communicating in relationships or in friendships

2. Interacting socially often feels awkward

3. Conversations can be exhausting

4. Does not like ‘chit-chat’

5. May have sensory sensitivities eg touch, smell, taste, noise

6. Friendships may be limited or 1 or 2 friends, rather than feel part of a group

7. You may thrive on routine / inflexible with change

8. Likes things done a certain way

9. Difficulty with transitioning / last minute change of plans

10. If you have an autistic child, you are more likely yourself to also be on the autism spectrum (high genetic prevalence of up to 90%)

11. You may be very literal / black and white thinking style / or come across as blunt or rude

12. You may get overwhelmed easily, especially around large crowds of people, people you don’t know, or in unfamiliar situations / may often feel the need to ‘retreat’ to a safe place

13. You may find maintaining constant eye contact with someone difficult, or uncomfortable

14. As a young girl, you may have grown up subconsciously observing other girls eg how they dress / their body language / mannerisms… or you find ‘people watching’ interesting

15. You may find you often mimic characters in t.v. shows or in movies

16. You may be a deep thinker / someone who ponders the wonders of life

17. You may over-analyse situations

18. Will often be ‘upfront’ in situations / conversations… or may find lying difficult (honesty prevails!)

19. You may enjoy your own company / prefer your own space / time alone

20. You may find maintaining relationships / friendships physically, emotionally, and mentally, draining

21. Hobbies and ‘interests’ or something you are passionate about, may often dominate your life / become a ‘fixation’

22. You may have been diagnosed with another disability/condition - these are co-occurring conditions of autism (not an inclusive list…)

    1. Generalised anxiety

    2. Social anxiety

    3. Depression

    4. ADHD (Inattentive, Hyperactive or Combination type)

    5. OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)

    6. Eating Disorder

    7. Sensory sensitivites

    8. Ehlers Danlos / hypermobile

    9. Dysautonomia

    10. Fibromyalgia

    11. Gastrointestinal issues (slow-transit constipation, Coeliac disease, Crohn’s disease…)

    12. Tourette syndrome

    13. Auditory Processing difficulties

    14. Borderline Personality Disorder

    15. Learning disabilities

23. You may have suffered from chronic fatigue sydrome / severe exhaustion

24. You may frequently fidget, using your hands, legs or feet

25. You may have a habit of twirling your hair

26. At school, you may have been known as the ‘quiet achiever’ / shy

27. Your emotions may be large, that is, you may have a tendency to ‘over react’ in situations

28. You may feel like there is something just not quite right, or that something is wrong but you don’t know what

29. You may see patterns in things

30. You may have a good memory with numbers / facts and figures / number plates

31. You may be a highly empathetic person, or not really feel empathy at all

32. You may be drawn to animals / love having pets

33. Some may say you have a ‘monotone’ voice

34. You may not understand jokes that well

35. You may feel the need to ‘act differently’ around other people / family members / friends (referred to as ‘autistic masking’ or ‘autistic camouflaging’)

36. You may not tune in to your bodily signals that well, eg when you need to go to the toilet, missing hunger signs, drinking enough water (known as ‘interoception’)

If any of the above autistic traits resonate with you, or you feel that you can identify with many of these characteristics, please see your G.P. (doctor) and ask for a referral to see a psychologist to discuss a possible autism diagnosis. I am not a psychologist. I am an autistic women, with lived experience, and mother of autistic boys, who has a background in psychology.

Nat x